INVASION of the FATRONAUTS

In the beginning life was JOY.

Everyone was happy, healthy, energetic and full of love and happiness.

Then about 100 years ago the first fatronauts appeared on the planet. No one at the time realized that their secret plan was to take over the entire planet.

There were very few fatronauts and so no one was concerned. Maybe only 1 out of 50 people.

Even when I was a child in the 1970’s there was only about 1 fatronaut for every thirty people. So we lived in peace with the fatronauts and all was well.

Now you may be wondering what a fatronaut is.

I did too, but it was explained to me by a wise man from Mexico while we were eating a salad at Baja Fresh here in NJ and observing the people eating at this fatronaut feeding ground.

Fatronauts are beings that almost look human but it’s like they have an astronaut suit on underneath their skin.

You know how those astronaut suits have really thick arms and legs to protect the astronauts from space. They literally had double or triple the thickness arms and legs that a normal human being of their height would have.

There was one other thing my Mexican wise man friend told me about the fatronauts. They also breathe deeply and make almost a Darth Vader like noise when they’re breathing in.

It’s just how they’d sound if they were wearing their astronaut suits and they were talking to you with through the speakers and you can hear them sucking down the oxygen.

Who knows maybe these beings really are wearing a space suit and it’s just disguised to look like skin.

But what has been shocking to see is the explosion of fatronauts here in the United States over the past 20 years and it’s happening around most of the world as well.

Where it used to be about 1 in 30 people or 3.33% of the population. Now it seems like it’s shot up to 1 out of every 2 people or 50% of the people have now been assimilated and turned into Fatronauts against their will.

That’s about a 1500% increase in the number of Fatronauts.

That’s just crazy.

Obviously they’re winning in their hidden goal to take over and destroy humanity.

So how did the fatronauts assimilate so many humans so quickly?

I think one of the greatest tricks was making everyone believe that being a fatronaut was the fashionable thing to do.

Most people now see being a fatronaut as normal. If you’re a slim, energetic and healthy human you’ll be ridiculed or in some cases looked down upon.

My lovely Karmyn has had that problem. Some men refused to date her because she was too skinny in their fatronaut fantasy deluded minds.

But I know (because I’ve lived long enough) that being a fatronaut is not normal it’s simply average these days.

And of course, some of us know that being a fatronaut is a life of living hell. Though if you’ve been infected by the fatronauts it’s likely you can’t see this because they’re subconsciously controlling and filtering your thoughts and eyes to see everything as if you were a true fatronaut.

Certainly you’ll die much younger than normal or thin humans. And there are a whole host of health problems associated with being a fatronaut not the least of which is diabetes.

So I asked my wise friend from Mexico, what can we do to rescue the humans from the scourge of the invading fatronauts.

First we have to shock them out of their fatronaut dream. We have to risk being politically incorrect to tell them they’ve been infected with the Fatronaut Virus.

But I protested. I don’t want all of the fatronauts to hate me because I’m telling them the truth while trying to save them from the dreaded fatronaut virus.

He said, don’t worry, they’re too slow to ever catch you. 🙂

And besides you know you’ve been sent here to this planet for a bigger mission of saving the fatronauts and the poisonedites (a poisonedite is someone who eats cooked food) from themselves.

Sometimes they have to be shocked before they realize what has happened to them.

I mean that is the primary reason of the success of the fatronaut invasion. They’ve made it SEEM normal to be a fatronaut. They’ve even taken over the doctors and the media, it’s a total invasion of our beloved planet Earth.

Ok, I said, I’ll do my best to shock them into a true human wakefulness so they can regain their health, happiness and true human beauty.

“Well done Roger,” said my wise Mexican friend.

And so my dear friend if you now realize that you’ve been infected by the fatronaut virus do not worry. That is not your true identity and you can easily beat this sickness.

The simple solution is to take off your invisible fatronaut space suit and soon enough you’ll be back to the idyllic life of a happy, healthy and slim human.

To Your Radiant Health, Happiness, Fitness and Infinite Potential,

Roger Haeske
The Youth Restorer and De-Poisonizer

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